Slimdowns and Setbacks

Like most girls (okay SOME girls) I have embarked on an endless sea of diets. Each time like these girls I fail to achieve my goals. Its a painful rollercoaster I put myself through but I guess I am now numb.
Today on a long bus ride from the Corporate Prison(aka work) to home I started to think earnestly about all my attempts.

The first time I started I was about 15 I had just started to pile on the pounds. I started a workout programme and quit within a week.

The second attempt was made when I just discovered Tumblr. Everyone seemed to have a fitblr and I didn't wanna feel left out so I started the journey too. I failed.

The third attempt waa done to bring back WonderBoy. Who is WonderBoy you ask? The one that got away I say. I honestly upto this point did not have the slightest clue why WonderBoy and I broke up. But I do remember that throughout our relationship I felt fat and ugly. I didn't understand why a good looking bloke would want Lard as a girlfriend. My feelings about myself most likely resonated in my actions. With WonderBoy oh I LOVED. At the same time I was at my most vulnerable point in life. I felt like a fraud like one day he was going to take a serious look at me and realise he had been drunk our entire relationship. That fairytale ended and we went our ways. However I still had a longing for him. So I jumped like a monkey in the backyard and ate rabbit food. Zero results. I somehow hoped that he would notice my new Salma Hayek like figure and beg me to come back. He didn't. Instead the next time he saw me he said "I really don't think you should be eating at all" he meant it as a joke but I got the message. I had gained.
From then on I developed a fat girls appetite. Candy, Pizza and Sodas were unashamedly demolished by my tummy.

I stepped on the scale one day and it told me my 5 2" frame was chasing a three figure weight. I decided this is it.

And so with that in mind I decided ENOUGH WAS DEFINITELY ENOUGH. Although I started this journey about a month ago I have learnt so much about my eating habits that I am determined to to make it to the final end.

My journey to fit starts now :)

Organic Writing

I'll be the first to admit that even though I find the writing process a cathartic almost therapeutic experience I struggle to come up with what to write.
When I started this blog I went through a thousand thought processes. First I wanted it to be a weight loss blog...then I gained weight. Then it became a fashion blog...I couldn't take enough pictures of my outfits. The whole time I kept trying to pattern my blog after many others I had seen on the blogsphere. I have always loved to write, rather than a silver spoon I was born with a pen and notepad in my mouth.
I began to dig deep into why I truly loved to write and when I truly love to write. I discovered loud music blaring into my ears provides the perfect environment for my musings. As I type this out I am on a bus and "how to save a life" by The Fray is keeping me company. However, my point is I have discovered that letting my blog grow organically has allowed me to truly dig deep into why I truly love to write.

Although I do not have the most glamorous life out there I do believe that my daily activities provide me with enough ink to allow my pen to write. Its been a beaitiful experience. Though I will admit sometimes I cringe at my own writings it has allowed me to grow.

Half the time I log on to my blog i really do not know what to write about but when I dig deeper inside and let the thought process flow its comes naturally.

So here's to a naturally flowing blog :)